MAMA SAID SHE LOVED ME BUT SHE COULD BE JIVING ME TOO!

Readers can you believe it’s Friday again. I hope you are all holding up well. The gif above depicts my feelings when confronted with the thought of one more game of Call of Duty, but hey folks hang in there we are in the home stretch so hold the line; be creative, try to get a little exercise in and don’t let it get to you. If it’s too much for you to handle, resist the temptation to engage in tele-therapy. You’re going to pay $150+ per hour to a jackass who’s studied psychology so they could understand themselves, instead schedule a Zoom or Skype shoot the shit with your friends. What’s a shoot the shit?

Rumor has it that a shoot the shit was invented by a boatswain. It’s a social interaction during which any topic can and is discussed. Participants don’t need to know anything about the topic or topics being discussed, they can use uncensured profanity, insult anyone they wish or change the subject altogether. Far more effective than the therapist and you can save your money for some ammo so you’re ready when the range opens up. So, let’s shoot the shit.

Coronavirus

If you watched today’s Corona Virus Task Force Briefing, you caught Bill Bryant, Acting Under Secretary for Science and Technology at DHS, go over some of his agency’s testing results as they pertain to the coronavirus chain. In that presentation he identified the effects of sunlight, or better stated ultraviolet light, bleach, alcohol, humidity and high temperatures on the coronavirus in shortening its viability on a variety of surfaces and in air. Well, already it is being interpreted as you should be outside and avoid mitigation. Absolutely not the case as Mr. Bryant indicated. The findings provide a set of additional knowledge tools to help us manage the virus and learn how the virus responds to specific conditions.

So, sanitize your home as you have been doing and limit social contact to a minimum, in other words continue to follow the CDC guidelines. If you’re infected and asymptomatic, which is a common condition, stripping naked and standing under a U.V. tanning lamp may improve your sex life but will do nothing to rid you of the infection. Placing a cookie sheet under a U.V. light for a couple of minutes or less will sterilize the cookie sheet. Keep in mind that ultraviolet light has a carthogenicity component, intensity and dosage needs to be carefully controlled as is duration of exposure. I hope everyone is tracking this.

Words

I learned a new word this week, it has German/Austrian origins. The word is schmick. There are a number of meanings or uses of the word but it can also mean to initiate sexual intercourse with a sleeping partner. Now, I don’t understand how this happens without waking your partner, but considering the mechanics of sexual intercourse it either means you’re an asshole bandit or pencil dick.

Economic Stimulus

Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin deserves every accolade, award and recognition the White House has to offer. He did an amazing job working with Congress to put together a financial rescue package for the country. He and President Donald J Trump put a parachute on the U.S. economy that will make its landing much, much softer. But, once Congress gets their hands on it you end up with language that is poorly written and was probably never read, so citizens on the receiving end may react adversely. This video is a clear illustration (adult language)

At the opposite end of the scale is the child’s story titled Brenda’s Beaver Needs a Barber (available at Amazon.com )

Have a great weekend! Laugh a little, be safe and be kind to yourself, your family and others.